Cute Little Quiz

This is long overdue. Take the quiz.

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

People dislike me because I’m straightforward to the point of being brutally honest. I will try to listen to both sides of an argument only when I do not have a vested interest in its outcome . Opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and they all stink. As far as I’m concerned, my side does not emerge without the toilet paper.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

All guys judge a girl by her looks. Would you prefer to look at Jessica Simpson or Ho Ching? While I admire intelligent people, I wouldn’t mind if they are good looking as well.

For the attractive part, no comments.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

I don’t need to know a person very well before I commit myself to a sexual relationship. I just require her to be pretty, free from disease, willing, and most importantly, female.

As for relationships of a more ‘lasting’ nature, I don’t really care. I like her for what she is, not what she was.

The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

I don’t believe in wasting my time with imbeciles, ingrates, the evolutionary regressed, parasites, vindictive bastards and other undesirables.

I believe in lust at first sight. If the lust survives long enough the love can come. While I’ll fall deeply and beautifully in love, I’ll still continue to lust deeply and beautifully at any tantalizing hussy who comes within my sight.

Your views on education

Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

I can’t wait to get out of that flophouse of a university. Even the ruins in Afghanistan would be more aesthetically pleasing than the hostile scenery I see when I go for class.

Who else but a bloody Singaporean wouldn’t want to earn his own keep and be independent? This quiz states the obvious.

The right job for you:

You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

I have little chance of doing any of them because I have the misfortune to be born in this stinking cuntry. My focus (or lack thereof) has nothing to do with it. I was thrown into a field which I absolutely hate and have no aptitude for. I couldn’t do sports professionally because I had no chance to receive formal instruction. Writing for money is rewarding, but I don’t have any ‘relevant’ qualifications and it’s likely what I write would land me in hot soup. I don’t mind risking my life as a mercenary – join the army, see the world – but Blackwater employs Americans. Even the French Legion is no more. In a nutshell, I’m fucked.

Understanding the root cause of my trials and tribulations I have therefore decided to make emigrating my profession and life goal. It will be the most rewarding career ever.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

I’ll bear that in mind should I decide to drop out of school.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Nobody likes to survive on charity. I hate being helpless; it’s a fate worse than death. What is life without independence?

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

I have as much energy as the zombies in The Land of the Dead. Whatever confidence I had had been shattered a long time ago and no amount of psychological resurrection can bring back what I lost. These days I don’t really care. Confidence is just bravado sugar-coated. The more you try to be confident, the more you are fucked.

The last two lines can be summed up: I’m just restless.