Current Affairs II

The panic over the swine flu is getting out of hand.

Millions of people around the world are infected with the HIV virus and nobody legislates the use of condoms. We have a hundred cases of swine flu and people start pressing the panic buttons. The World Health Organization clearly do not know what the fuck they are doing. Five out of six on the Alert Scale is overreacting. I would have put it at three. To date, how many people have died from swine flu? The survival rate (over 90%) is still pretty high. Contrast swine flu to cancer, heart problems, and AIDS. Egypt just butchered most of its pigs. Mexicans are treated like they are the carriers of some alien virus. News of the disease continue to dominate the airwaves.

It’s irritating. First we have the economic crisis and the endless discussion of what happened to corporate governance (as if it existed in the first place), then the Somalia pirates, Pakistan’s capitulation to the Taliban and now the swine flu. No doubt the news are absorbing but sometimes I wish they can take a break from reporting all these and concentrate on real issues. Like how a certain regime with the “Mandate of the People” tag are treating its citizens worse than pigs. The pigs in Egypt at least got a quick death. Here it’s a slow and lingering demise, made worse by listening to the regime’s incessant pseudo-pedantic claptrap and being squeezed of every drop of blood. (By the end of it, you still have to pay for your own funeral, unlike our friends the pigs.)

In our incredibly “unique” cuntry, it is impossible to go into any regime-owned/sponsored building without having your temperature taken. This is ridiculous. If I catch the flu at this moment I can hardly be expected to develop flu symptoms right away yeah? There are plenty of crowded places like train stations, bus interchanges and shopping centres but why aren’t people in these places required to use their thermometers? There are hordes of cheap foreign workers in GL every night and spreading disease via their body odors and bodily secretions, i.e., semen so why are they exempted?

It is so bad now that students are being fined for forgetting to bring their thermometers to school. In case the fucking authorities had been living in a cave and sharing bodily secretions with Mr. Bin Laden and didn’t know shit, we are in the middle of the worst recession since 1930. A recession that is going to get worse. Fining people when they are struggling to pay bills is absolutely shameful. Only in Singapore can such bullshit happen without people protesting about it. Fuck this cuntry.

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While having supper in GL last night, Chicken and I saw a cat-fight. Several Vietnamese whores decided to liven up the night with some good old-fashioned WWE action. The coffee-shop proprietor quickly broke up the fight. Even so, one was left on her bum, rubbing her lips with her hands and looking dazed.

The entertainment lasted about a minute, but was nevertheless impressive. Our food arrived and Chicken and I attacked it with relish. Halfway through our supper Chicken pointed at a scruffy character prying a floorboard several yards from where we were seated. The board opened a crack and he fished out two packages of fags. After ten minutes or so, a different bloke came and did the same thing. Then another. Their entrepreneurship and humanistic spirit deserve the highest approbation. With the recession and fags being priced so high by our mercenary, totalitarian and soulless regime, these ethical businessmen allow smokers to get their kicks without bursting their bank. This is truly social responsibility.

The gambling tables were nowhere to be found. The presence of a couple of fuzz sitting in the vicinity put business to a halt. I don’t know why people endure three years for a polytechnic diploma in Casino Management when it is obvious that you need only brains and confidence to run a table. When the Integrated Resorts (IR) are up, these people should be employed. Why choose greenhorns out of polytechnics when people with relevant experience are readily available?

Kids are loitering in GL. While in principle, I have nothing against that – I consider the sightseeing to be enriching – the number of kids may cause the fuzz to clamp down on GL even more. The other night I saw a group of teenagers (with a couple of girls among them) questioned by the fuzz. There are many ways to impress your date. You don’t need to bring them to a red-light district just to show her how ‘man’ you are. With teenage girls being so horny these days, I am sure it doesn’t take much to get one to spread her legs.

If you are a male teenager, complete with raging hormones, and want to sightsee, please do not bring your little girlfriends with you. Please do not wear your Singapore Polytechnic “Freshmen Orientation 09” T-shirt. It’s conspicuous and draws the attention of the fuzz. Wear something suitably sloppy which blends you in. This is a red-light district, not a teensy club, for Asmodeus’ sake! I am sure people do not want the fuzz to raid the area in the name of “social morality”. So please, show some sense.

Back to the main topic. The PRC merchandise ($100 price tag) are back in the CBD. In my opinion, many of them belong in the $60/80 category. While most are still aesthetically pleasing, you will not get good value for money in terms of “feel” and selection. Like the global economy, the recovery will take place, but slowly.

The $60 and $80 streets are mostly empty. They are too near to where the fuzz usually laze around and the lack of concealment and “safe-houses” make soliciting a tricky business. You may get the odd heroine once in a while, but don’t count on the quality.

You may also find a few PRC goods standing opposite the $60 street. Their quality is comparable to the ones found in the CBD, which does not mean a great deal. However, you may be able to find the rare gem if you are lucky.

The Indonesian merchandise are more blatant. Their inferior quality may explain their gungho attitude. They have nothing to lose. Still, when it comes to alert, they respond swiftly and decisively. Our mighty military can learn a thing or two from these cheap whores. Like the need to MOVE FAST!

The Indian merchandise, with their saris and thick waists are not recommended for the discerning client. Their mediocrity, and the unsavory prospect of being a “sperm brother” with the masses of cheap laborers they have served, makes renting them an extremely unwise and possibly damaging business transaction.

For the same reason, avoid the fish tanks. There are so many strange characters going in and out of the overworked merchandise that they cannot be accorded safe. $50 for a 25 minute round is too obscene, considering the current economy.