Wednesday @ UniShit; and Good Slop

There are many things one can do on Wednesday nights. Some blokes go to the club - it's ladies' night - to try to score. Being long-suffering students of UniShit and hated atheists (some asshole up there hates our guts), our lot was to rush straight from our gulags to UniShit.

After coughing out $32 to take a cab there, we were half expecting that we would be turned away due to the long queue. To our consolation, the queue was unlike Saturday’s. It reached nearly to the end of the corridor instead of all the way down into the stairwell. XH and I lined up and entertained ourselves by stating facts about this ‘flophouse’ of a university. As usual, the queue was ugly and the surroundings unsightly. It was a credit to the underpaid staff’s regard for their own safety that they did not get rid of the people still queuing when the clock struck 7.30pm (closing time).

Two latecomers, incensed at being denied entry by a puny UniShit staff, removed the flimsy barrier, walked past the poor man like he was not there, and proceeded to take their rightful places in the queue. I was impressed with the two fellows. Despite their late arrival, they had every right to collect what was owed them and they asserted themselves most remarkably. Too bad the Dean and his management team were not there. Their confrontation would have been most spectacular.

UniShit are so incompetent they cannot even barricade an area properly. They could have effectively prevented any latecomers from barging their way through by putting attack dogs at the exit and entrance. Sadly, they are so cretinous they could not even come up with a simple solution like this. I read that they are offering degrees with majors in military studies. I do not want to imagine what their graduates will be like.

We went to West Mall and settled on a Chinese restaurant for our slop. After the shit we had for the day, we fully deserved some good slop and holy meat. We were not disappointed. The slop was good and the pork and beef were a treat to our delicate palate. There was a couple sitting on both sides of us. To my left a pretty dolly from China was patiently listening to the meaningless patter and chest-thumping boasts of her Singapore paramour. The former specimen was typical of the local species – inarticulate, ugly and out of shape; the latter had a nice rack and smooth skin that made me want to caress. I watched the dolly force smiles and I pitied her. She was clearly too good for the slobbering and stupid Neanderthal seated across her. She should be with me instead. She wouldn’t have to fake orgasms.

To my right sat a teen couple. Their roving eyes for each other and the heat emanating from their bodies betrayed their licentious and their burning desire to copulate. As XH and I were criticizing the general intelligence of the local population, Ris Low, the ‘emo-ness’ of most Arts students, that vindictive cunt from China who won’t pay XH, so on and so forth, they were also talking to each other about us. I prefer that they join in the conversation. If they are offended they should tell us and we would have been all too happy to educate them. Sad to say, like most of younger generation, they lacked both wit and guts. Lastly, if they are so desperate, they should rent a room. There are several hotels in Geylang that offer two hour packages at highly affordable prices.